Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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