Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize
