Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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