i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
you will always have a special place in my vag
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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