forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
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i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
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I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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