we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
It's no shave November. This is our time.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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