So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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