Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
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