Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
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