Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
