i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize
