I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
