drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize
