Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Randomize
