she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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