I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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