At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
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