North Korea, Best Korea!
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
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