Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
She bit a glass in half.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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