that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
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