D3 body, D1 cock
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
