she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
sarcasm needs its own font
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
