Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
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