so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
