you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize