Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize
