I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
