Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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