we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
Randomize
