Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Randomize
