If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
My ATM looks so different sober.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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