They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Randomize
