just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
Randomize
