The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Randomize
