Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
