i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
