I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
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