why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
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