Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize
