Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
