READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
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