I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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