We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
