I CAN MOONWALK!
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
