i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
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