Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.

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(412): I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God. http://tfl.nu/yxgi

Replies (34) Good night (1227) Bad night (2701)
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(804): View more from Virginia

my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.

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(804): my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it. http://tfl.nu/l9cy

Replies (18) Good night (4795) Bad night (729)
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(859): View more from Kentucky

I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.

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(859): I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver. http://tfl.nu/rtt7

Replies (2) Good night (889) Bad night (3013)
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(810): View more from Michigan

Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.

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(810): Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever. http://tfl.nu/u46n

Replies (21) Good night (5262) Bad night (1995)
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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

I'm pregnant just thinking about him.

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(412): I'm pregnant just thinking about him. http://tfl.nu/pqtq

Replies (34) Good night (3441) Bad night (4457)
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(919): View more from North Carolina

I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was

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(919): I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was http://tfl.nu/prge

Replies (6) Good night (3195) Bad night (1129)
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(919): View more from North Carolina

Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.

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(919): Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music. http://tfl.nu/oyb0

Replies (24) Good night (8021) Bad night (1134)
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(813): View more from Florida

We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.

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(813): We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing. http://tfl.nu/09y7

Replies (4) Good night (1905) Bad night (710)
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(937): View more from Ohio

You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable

(1-937): View more from Ohio

I can do at least one of those things.

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(937): You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable (1-937): I can do at least one of those things. http://tfl.nu/zzd3

Replies (2) Good night (1843) Bad night (545)
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(816): View more from Missouri

Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.

(816): View more from Missouri

I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.

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(816): Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night. (816): I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it. http://tfl.nu/9xew

Replies (6) Good night (1745) Bad night (743)
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(585): View more from New York

You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.

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(585): You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett. http://tfl.nu/f5z3

Replies (10) Good night (1512) Bad night (547)
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(613): View more from Ontario

You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".

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(613): You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast". http://tfl.nu/iqmw

Replies (12) Good night (2584) Bad night (712)
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(812): View more from Indiana

Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night

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(812): Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night http://tfl.nu/74fx

Replies (5) Good night (1114) Bad night (485)
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(810): View more from Michigan

Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.

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(810): Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am. http://tfl.nu/2nux

Replies (2) Good night (435) Bad night (641)
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(618): View more from Illinois

I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.

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(618): I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little. http://tfl.nu/lho3

Replies (2) Good night (242) Bad night (382)

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