She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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