i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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