I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize