glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
