Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
