I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
This is my gift to your gina
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
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